Tuesday, January 13, 2009
You will always be my grandpa
(in the tune of Always Be My Baby by David Cook)
We were as one family
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine
Now you want to be well
So I'm letting you go
Cause I know in my heart grandpa
Our love will never die
No!
You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Hey don't you know you can't escape Him
Ooh grandpa cause you'll always be my grandpa
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh grandpa cause you'll always be my grandpa...
This song have been in my head since this morning. I don't know why but it's just stuck in my head. Then came evening, I was busy but the chorus of this song kept repeating in my head but replacing baby into grandpa.
I can't believe he's really leaving on Thursday. As I was burning joss paper in the evening, I was thinking about how guilty I've been feeling. Because I don't know why but I felt attached/close to my paternal grandpa. Maybe it's because he's the only grandpa alive previously or maybe it's because he lives with my family longer than any of my aunts or uncles (meaning that he's been living with me since I was really young.) and thinking of how I kinda shunned him while having him at my place and how I was so busy at work that I didn't have the time to visit him more often (as promised in my previous post) in the old folks home/hospital makes me feel guilty.
Maybe that's the reason why I didn't really want to come up when my mum told me to.
It feels as if time really passes so fast. One day my grandpa moved into my current home with my family, years later he moved into one of my aunt's place. Few weeks later he fell and knocked his head against something and that caused him to have partial stroke then he's back at my place from the hospital. After a few months, he moved into one of my uncle's place where he's not comfortable with, so it was back to my place again where all my aunts and uncles decided to put him into *ofh and that's where his condition detiorated. Landed him into hospital and everything happens.
I really wish that I could turn back time and suggest to my aunts and uncles that he stays at my place permantly and I could take care of him instead of my mum.
#
Maybe that song was on repeat mode in my mind was also because I miss EA.
Girls, I'm sorry if you felt that I gave up on you girls on the first day. I really do.
I didn't thought that I could pull through but girls, you made me believe that you girls can make it. You girls made me realise that I could pull through with the twelve of you.
On the last day when the trainers followed you onto the bus, I really wanted to. I may say that I don't know whether I still have work to do back in office, but deep down, I didn't bear to see you girls cry even though I know that most of you cry anyway.
Girls, stay strong. It's the start of a new school term. I want you to strive in school. Most imortantly, I want you to be happy.*ofh= old folks home
xoxoxo
grouptrainer<3
2:21 AM
